The Meaning Of It All

"Life has meaning, only when we share it with someone, otherwise life is just one seamless journey from birth to death."

Curthom

The Warmth Of Life

"When I was a boy, I use to stare at the sun. I use to stare at the sun to see if I could see its origins. I would stare at the sun for so long and so often, that its warmth scorched my eyes. I stared at the sun so frequently, that its brightness, stole my sight and left me in darkness.
Now I live in darkness, stumbling over my ignorance of why I did what I did. Though my world is one of sustained darkness, I still feel the warmth of the sun. I'm not angry at the sun for taking my sight away, nor am I angry at myself for being too curious of where the sun comes from. Some say, I was stupid for staring at the sun and that's why I lost my sight. That's all in the past now, although I am reminded each day of the mistake that I made in staring at the sun. There are those who can see everything, yet understand very little of what they saw. There are some who stare at the unfortunate circumstances of others and comment negative things, even though they have little knowledge of that person's plight. I forgive myself for being foolish in staring at the sun, but I could never forgive myself for my curiosity of the sun's origin. I smile each day that I'm given no matter how terrible others tell me it is, because I'm still grateful for the warmth of the sun."
An excerpt from Curthom.

No matter how difficult our circumstances seem to be to us, there is always someone, somewhere who has it worse. We shouldn't celebrate the fact that there is someone worse off then ourself, but rejoice in the reality that we have much to be grateful for and quite often it is a humbling experience. Just the other day I was murmuring about the fact that I didn't have enough petrol to get to class and had to walk. Well it rained quite heavily that morning and even though I had set out early to class, I was soaking wet and quite cold. The air conditioned classroom made it unbearable for me at first, so I went to the restroom and took off all of my clothing in the handicap stall and rung out all of my clothing and put them back on.

When I arrived back to class, I saw that many of the students had not shown up yet and the teacher announced that one of the students had an accident and wouldn't be attending the class for a while. I didn't think much about it during the class until the walk half-way home. The sun shined all afternoon and was the complete opposite of the weather on my walk to class. I kept wondering what caused the student to have the accident? Was it the weather? Were they rushing because they were late to class? Did a driver run the traffic signal? I didn't know, but I was hoping that they were going to be okay.

Arriving home after the walk to and from class, I was grateful that I was healthy enough to go the distance to and from class without stopping to rest or collapsing along the way. It was only six miles or so, but it had been a long time since I've walked six miles and it seemed more like 12 miles each way due to my aching legs and feet. The first mile seem to go on forever and the more I concentrated on the negative, my having to walk, the more grueling the walk became. After about the second mile I was famished and would have paid anything for an ice cold soda pop and then the rain came. First as little drops, you know the kind of drops that makes you think that a bird just took a leak from above and about ten minutes later, came the rain with a vengeance. I got so wet, so quickly, that my shoes were making sucking sounds before I could find cover to stand under. I couldn't really wait out the rain so I continued my journey to class arriving early enough to try to dry out some. I was so happy that I made it to class and I didn't burn any gasoline getting there and back that I treated myself to a baseball cap from the one of the many thrift stores on the way home. The baseball cap cost less than a gallon of gas, in fact the cap cost about a fourth of the price of a gallon of gas. All and all, I've learned not to fret over things that I can not change and look for the good in everything, including the circumstances we find ourselves in sometimes, because the world is a big place and there is always someone who is worse off then ourself. My experiences living here and abroad have taught me to celebrate the good in all of us, even though it may take some effort and action to achieve it. So in summary, what did I learned in class that day? Well, it was an Economics Class and this is what I gathered from it, that there are things in business that happen that we can not predict or forecast and it costs the parties involved time, money or opportunity and when it happens, Economics refers to it as an "externality," but in most of our worlds, we simply call it, "Life."

I

An Impressionable Journey

After a much needed vacation, I found myself returning from an extended stay deep within the jungles of South East Asia. I lived a rather indigenous life during this time not so much out of want, but out of necessity. I was so far from any conveniences that after several days, I started to adopt the ways of the natives around me.

It was Friedrich Nietzsche who wrote about his opinions on life, and I paraphrase that "Everything said, has already been spoken." So, I'll be brief in telling about my little adventure in South East Asia. I left America for a brief spell, because like so many Americans, I had become complacent with things going on around me and needed a "wake up call," however you may define it. For me, a "wake up call," was an effort to get away from being around so much "stuff" and getting back to what really mattered in life, and for me that meant breathing with ease and sweating without fainting.

I spent more time than I probably needed looking for clean drinking water and then fetching it and bringing it back to cook. The coconuts shells had to be dried out in advance and if, it didn't rain, there was plenty of dried cobra (dried coconut shells) to use as charcoal to start and sustain a fire. Cold water showers were the norm and the chicken that had awaken me earlier, became my breakfast hours later.

Eating, had become such a big deal now that I was so far away from a supermarket, store or "mom and pop" concern that sells basic items like rice, cooking oil, some spices, tobacco and , soaps. These "mom and pop" stores, called sari-saris, are a mainstay all through out South East Asia, and if, you don't have one close by, then you really are far out from everything.

Plenty of time to think and those questions that many of us, have little time to answer, like, what's really important in my life? Why am I here? What's my purpose in this life? What am I doing here? Why did this or that happen to me? You get the picture--maybe I should include a picture, huh? Perhaps next time....

So, in keeping it brief, here is what a trip to the jungle taught me, yep, I'm still learning, even as I breathe. Mosquito repellent purchased in America, is an appetizer for the mosquitoes of South East Asia. Boxer underwear aren't very comfortable after a 6 mile walk through thick brush. Flip flop shoes have that one strap that goes between your big toe and the next toe, and it's never really durable enough to stay in place. Suntan lotions are nothing more than cooking oil.

Oh yeah, you don't have to worry about what to do because the overwhelming majority of your time is spent getting clean water to drink and cook, finding something to eat, cooking it, washing up, doing laundry and walking up and down one mountain after another to get to where you're going, if indeed you're going the right way and in between all of these activities, napping.

From it all, I paraphrase what I've learned, those who had lots of creature comfort stuff like, a tent, blankets, fancy propane stove, pots, pans, utensils, weeks worth of clothing, suffered the most, getting to the clearings where we camped, but once we got there, they seem to relish in the things they brought, but what if, they lost their things, could they still survive in the jungle? So, it brings to mind, something someone told me while living in China:

"To claim no possessions, so that no possessions may claim you."
A Chinese Proverb

In my youth I had 11 fine European automobiles and if, you ask me now, why? I couldn't really tell you, except I didn't drink or smoke and basically the only vice I had back then was my love of well-constructed motor cars. Looking back in hindsight, I see how those 11 European automobiles enslaved me. Enslaved me in the sense that I couldn't go away for too long of a period of time, for fear something would come of those cars. Something like someone stealing one or a few of them in my absence or worry about someone breaking into them and taking parts off of them, after all, some of the cars were unique and rare indeed!

In due part because of those cars, I had to give up extended vacations of months at a time in far flung places like Southern China and the lesser Antilles in the Caribbean and such. Needless to say I was single then as I am now, and answered only to The Most High, and whatever desire that moved me at the time. That I guess is the luxury of youth. You're young, you have little responsibilities and your time is spent doing the things you love and cherish. Fast Forward several decades later, and you look upon the past and ask yourself, what the heck was I thinking?

I was so caught up working hard and climbing the career ladder until one day I realized there weren't enough rungs on that career ladder to climb, because there were too many of us climbing the same ladder and no "man made" ladder could endure such weight or ambitions. Unfortunately for many and perhaps fortunate for some, we got the promotions, the big house in a gated community, the trophy wife, the luxury car, the fancy sports car, the two children onto the wait list at the local private school even before they were born and now some of us are wondering, now what?

Most of the folks I know or use to know, are so caught up with keeping the things that they've worked so hard for that they rarely have time to visit friends anymore. They are too busy trying to maintain, service or repair their possessions on their days off. Many, if not most, have so many things, if you asked them to list the things they have, some would have difficulty penning everything down on paper. However, much of what my friends possess, just collects dust and the other things they have, just gets abused, because there is little time to learn how to operate some of their toys properly.

When I ask my friends, when is your next vacation or holiday, the general response I get is, "Well, we thought about driving or flying down to this place or that place for a few days and try to relax when we get there, but they're always taking their cellphones, laptops, or other tech devices that keeps them connected to the rest of the world. So, even on their short two or three day outings, there is little time to unwind.

I think the more we become interconnected as a planet, the tendency to want to stay in touch with others will only increase. I know that my 11 cars that I owned at one time in my youth, surely seemed like children after some time and I really couldn't venture off too far. I see that same behavior in many of my friends today, with not having the time to get away for months at a time, to explore another culture, lifestyle, language, etc.. It is far too easy today to allow our possessions to possess us. The more we have, the greater the tendency to think about what we have, and base many of our decisions on doing what we have to do, on keeping what we have. I know now in this point in my life, that which I place greatest claim to, aren't things or possessions. Rather, I lay claim to good health, long life and the curiosity to go beyond the borders of my birthplace and see with my own eyes, how others inhabit this Earth, that is my claim.