There are many Filipinas in America. Most Filipinas in America are not what most Traditional American Men are looking for. Many Filipinas in America were either born in America or came to America by way of a State Department of The United States Visa Category, such as Fiance, Spousal or Labor Certification-based Work Visa, such as Nursing. There are some Filipinas who came to America on a Visitor Visa and never returned to Philippines, but that is not the subject of this article.
It has been my personal experience of over many decades living in the Philippines and Abroad and from what I have observed, that there are more than a minority of Filipinas who get married with no intention of staying with their husbands. Most of these particular Filipinas are just looking for a way to better themselves and the question that I get asked often is, “Can you blame them?” I will leave that answer up to those who are in a relationship with a Filipina or contemplating a relationship with a Filipina.
This brief article will deal with some of the consequences from my own personal experiences and from that of which I have observed with friends and family members who are in a relationship with a Filipina. My observations have shown me that there is a minority of Filipinas who stay with their husbands once they reach their home countries over a decade after marrying a Filipina and it doesn’t mater whether they were married in the Philippines or in their home country.
The Filipinas who stayed together with their husbands even after a decade of marriage are rare and from my experience not the norm from what I have observed. Perhaps I am looking in the wrong places or in the wrong directions, but the fact remains, more than a few Filipinas just start by being unfaithful, ungrateful and unappreciative of their husbands about two years prior to actually walking out one day without even saying goodbye or giving a reason for such a dramatic withdrawal.
The truth is hard pill to swallow and I experience this myself after repeated and exhaustive attempts to work things out over a three year period, but my other half, just got bolder and bolder with her blatant displays of infidelity that I could no longer deny the truth. I have observed this behavior from the Filipina wives of friends and family and the result was always the same, their Filipina wife, just left without so much as giving a reason.
Do I still want to be in a relationship with a Filipina, some of you may ask? I would like to be in a relationship with any woman who knows and understand what loyalty is and is willing to build a relationship that is enduringly a lifetime commitment. So, yes, I would like to think that I can find a Filipina who is not predetermined to leave me, even before she commits, because English is easy to say, but it doesn’t have any meaning unless it is backed up with action.
Some Filipinas who are in will be influenced by their American friends, both male and female and other Filipinas who have been influenced by America propaganda and Hollywood. What passes for morality and ethics on television and Hollywood, often times passes for education of what being an American is all about for more than a few Filipinas and that is just the beginning of the friction between them.
I guess the answer some of you may come to an conclusion with is to not get married to a Filipina, but that wouldn’t be my answer. Clearly, this could happen to any man, irrespective to what nationality his wife is from, but since we are concerning ourselves with Filipinas, we just give our opinion about some Filipinas. There are lovely ladies from the Filipinas who would be perfect for any man, but the challenge is to find that one Filipina who is, what she said she is and her actions prove her out.
A decade or so before I got married to a Filipina, my well-meaning friends advised me against marrying the Filipina that I was in love with. I followed my heart and 16 years later and a fortune later, they were right. She took every dime I had and left me penniless and in poor health and then just up and walked out on me one day after a two year affair with a personal injury lawyer who handled her divorce against me.
I watched her swear to God on a Bible to tell the truth in divorce court and her answer to the Judge, started with a lie and ended with a lie, and she professed to be a Christian. So, what I’m saying is that I’m not mad at her because when I met her and her family, they had nothing and I mean nothing! No running water, no electricity, no house, no toilet, nothing!
Being the Christian that I am, I provided for her and her family, her sisters and brothers and a few properties, a house with fine furniture and appliances later, paid for the Nursing School of her sister and brother and set her mother up in business and brought a farm for her father. I gave her everything she asked for and things she didn’t ask for and one day, when she couldn’t get anything more from me financially, she just walked out and sued me for support in divorce court.
As I stated earlier, I’m not mad at her, she was doing what her parents taught her to do and it was the unconditional love that I had for her that allowed her to receive so much from me and my family. Now, she has gone on to drain some other schmuck of his fortune and his dreams and all I can say to her is, “more power to you.”
There is someone for everyone and it took me sometime to figure that she wasn’t the one for me, but my heart wouldn’t let me rationalize on what was going on, because I loved her more than I loved myself and after while, I didn’t even remember who I was. I had given her so much time, attention and affection that I smoldered the love. When she left, I was devastated, but that devastation was the first step to being reborn.
Some Filipinas will take you for a ride and some Filipinas will ride with you on this journey called Life and that is the Filipina that you want to get with. You want someone who is deserving of your time, your attention and your heart and our Heavenly Father, would have no less. So, take your time and go slow and when the right Filipina or woman comes along, you’ll be ready.
